Leslie Bennetts explores the role men play in housework and childrearing
Article Source: msnbc.com
from:msnbc.comChores for two: Why men don't pitch in
Seeded on Wed Mar 10, 2010 5:09 PM EST (msnbc.com)
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This guy's a soy-latte drinking eunuch.
This guy's a soy-latte drinking eunuch.
Thank you for reminding me why I have decided to never get married. I dont need to spend the rest of my life being treated like a child by a woman who readily compares me to a child.
The solution to all of Leslie Bennetts problems? Don't get married in the first place.
I don't understand women who choose to live an outdated lifestyle--marriage--and complains how it reeks of sexism and inequality. You chose to become a wife. A wife is a housekeeper who raises children. If you don't like that role, stay single and be fully independent of men. Women like Leslie Bennetts is the reason our country's divorce rate hovers around 50%.
Let's be honest here. As a woman, if you were with a man who was a complete pushover and couldn't even stand up to his own wife you would NOT be attracted to him! Woman like Alpha males and leaders, not subservients and yes-men. Best advice here is not getting married, and if you must be prepared and know your role going in to it.
And i bet you think it's ok to choose when he gets sex, passes gas, or spend time with his friends. Or have you told him no male friends like most ball busting B's out there? Women aren't turned on by push over men like this. That's why most women are with men that do what they want! Because they are still independent thinking MEN, their thoughts aren't controlled by someone else just because she has a vagina. While he is out working, you should be too. Even if you aren't bringing in an income you should contribute to the household. I'm not saying us men should be lazy, not by any means. But I do believe, if a woman wants to be a stay at home mom then she has chosen her profession and she should do what she can to be the best stay at home mom she can. If he's working all day and still has to come home to help you with your chosen "career" because you told him he has to seems like your expecting too much. He can choose to help, and no amount of nagging will make him want to help! Does he ask you to take care of everything at your chosen "career" (i.e. stay at home mom) and then tell you that you have to come help him at his income providing career? Seems a little unfair to think you can demand what he does, in the same respect he shouldn't demand you to do work for him. As a single man, who plans to stay that way, the only time i will let a woman boss, nag, or guilt me into doing something is when she signs my paychecks. On the other hand, sometimes in the bedroom it's refreshing to actually hear a woman tell you what she wants. And if they want me to read their mind, I will do what feels good to me.
Women have wanted equality and respect, fine you can have it. I say earn it!
Some do, most just whine till they get it. Women always take time out of their schedule to show up at their kids functions. Has a single one of them ever thought about the men back at their office who is busting his A to pick up the pace to get her job done while she's gone. In my experience NO!
The last time I was a pushover with a woman I got screwed over.
The last time I helped her only when I wanted to and was able I got screwed over.
But when I only do what I want and don't let a woman tell me what to do, well lets just say I have no stress and actually enjoy life again...
It amazes me how women get to decide what chores are important and then belittle us if we do not share their values. Always making up keep busy work tells me that there is something fundamentally wrong with women and that perhaps they cannot stand spending any time with there own thoughts. I am perfectly content not committing useless @!$%# to memory, and who gives a @!$%# what size of shoe your children wear, thats why you try them on at the store. Simple problem, simple solution.
Honestly, I couldn't read the entire article..blah blah men are lazy.. Why get married then? If men are clearly lazier and less intelligent..then why do women expect so much from us ..and why the hell do they want to marry us if we are only going to disappoint and make their life miserable?
I don't see the upside for a man to be married these days. I can have sex and not be married. I can fall in love and not cheat and not be married. If I get married and it doesn' t work out, the wife takes my house, my stuff and I have to pay her alimoney? I respectfully pass on marriage. I love women but not marriage and definitley not divorce. I was married once and I can't afford another ex wife anyways.
I don't understand.....how is this men's problem? Women wanted to take on extra work outside the home to be Liberated. Now you want men to help with all the extra work you made for yourselves??? After flooding the job market with labor now WOMEN HAVE TO WORK... Looks like you got what you asked for : )
wheres the love it button?!?! ive been saying it all along. feminists of past generations ruined my life!
Women should raise their own family and their own children. Men don't have any parental or property rights anyway. Who needs this kind of sh*t??? With women initiating 70+% of all divorce at a roughly 50% divorce rate who wants to live with them and take a chance?
What is really going on is that women are more miserable and stressed out than ever before. Misery loves company. How's that liberation working out for ya? There is no need to marry or commit to a woman anymore...women changed marriage laws in the 70's
Not one person who commented on here feels that men and women should contribute equally??!!? REALLY?!? If a wife is working full time and a husband is working full time it should be that child rearing and housework are divided equally! If you are a man who does not want to help around the house then you need to marry a woman who will stay home and do that stuff. Most working women I know have explained this at the start of the marriage and the man is the one who does not hold up his end of the bargain. That is why there is divorce. If the husband was MAN enough he would stick by his word he would make an EFFORT and not have to be nagged to do what he should be doing already without being asked!
Yes, I feel that men and women should contribute equally. That is why men and women should contribute at each others' homes respectively. If you need to nag, bitch, and withold sex to get a men to do things, you shouldn't marry us. I's that simple.
In today's day in age there is no need for or benefit for men to get married anyhow. Women wanted independence, so do what you must.
It's fascinating how the writer mentions that women are always taking time off work to "attend PTA, take kids to the doc, etc." yet women always complain about pay inequality in jobs, perhaps if they spent more time at work, they'd get paid more.
One of my professors always states that an employer-employee relationship is like a marriage. Who in their right minds would want to work for a woman like this?
Wow! This poor guy Jeremy married an enormous B--ch! First, he does more things than any self-respecting man would do placate his wife. Second, his wife writes a completely humiliating article about him to return the favor. Third while humiliating him, she personally ingratiates herself. lol!
I couldn't get through the article, it was just way too depressing. Can someone tell me, is there happy ending? I mean does this guy, Jeremy, eventually leave her for some hot young chick? Does, Jeremy, have an epiphany one day and say, "why am I doing all this?"
If not, run, Jeremy, run, buddy, run!!! Get out now!!!! Life is for the living, buddy!!!
Why should she do all the house/child rearing work when she also has a career? I am probably feeding a troll, but I can't help.
Are you serious Frances? Just switch man with woman or husband with wife for a minute and you'll see how this article sounds.
Here we have Leslie Bennetts asking for equality while at the same time being extremely bossy and urinating on her husband for all the world to see (...well to read)
Let me quote:
"I admit that my husband helps out more than many men, but here’s another news flash: It isn’t because he’s such a fabulously enlightened being. Left to his own devices, he would doubtless park himself in front of the TV like some sitcom male-chauvinist couch potato while I did all the work. The reason Jeremy “helps” as much as he does is simple: He doesn’t have a choice."
Lol, this is so incredibly sexist : 1: Jeremy is better than many men. 2: Yet, he would still park himself in front of TV all the time. Do the math she means most men are lazy pigs. And she's the one calling men 'chauvinist' aka sexist. Ah, and "Left to his own devices", so basically Leslie you're telling the world that your husband is a useless being and cannot think for himself? Like I said replace male by female (including the he/his with she/her) in this sentence and you'll see.
This is the funniest "When my husband has lingered too long over the sports section and I’m feeling overwhelmed by the number of errands that must be run, I hand him a list. This is what I need you to do today, I say in a tone of voice that brooks no equivocation. He may moan and groan, but the jobs get done. And while I still have to mastermind the operation — somehow he is never the one who remembers bla bla bla..."
Unreal, absolutely unreal. I can just imagine myself handing a list over to my wife and say "This is what I want you to do!! And there is no argument!" She'll probably laugh and we'd soon be laughing together. This woman is not joking though. Honestly Frances, would you liked to be treated like this man is treated by his wife? And then would you like him to put on the internet and in a book how brainless you are without him? To be honest, any man with a minimum of self-respect, after reading that on the internet, would divorce on the spot, no questions asked and above all no answers. Regardless of the outcome, hard for the children but if they ever read that, they might understand. There is a point where self-respect is all you need to keep.
Finally, a few lines after talking about equal partnership: "in my experience husbands are a lot like children." Wow, you really are the head of the family Leslie, aren't you? What does it say about your real view of partnership?
"It really does work, I promise." Does-it? Frankly I'm surprised you're still married... When some men leave their wife for younger ones as you said, treating them as children is sure to make them stay, or maybe they left because these women followed your advice in the first place? Somehow I doubt that treating her husband like a child is the advice my wife will tell my daughter. What advice do you give to your son I wonder "You will become a man so you will always be a child (yes Leslie, that's what you've just said), you will need your wife to think for you!" While you're advocating for girl power (which is perfectly fine when done genuinely) do you realise what you might be doing to him? Such motherly love...
I'm a Lady Boomer doing research for a book I'm writing entitled, Be Brave. Lose the Beige. I've conducted a survey of Lady Boomers- women between the ages of 46-65 and we/they are suffering the consequences from patterns established long ago. Thanks for this insightful article.
This is a fascinating article. I have always demanded my rights as a woman, including in my partnership (to a man). I depresses me that these are still issues.
Your crazy. And he is crazier for marrying you and making babies. You deserve each other.